Today, we would like to help you with some self-care tips, starting from 2 questions:
- How often do you think about yourself?
- How often do you put yourself first?
As someone who spends so much time giving to others, helping family members and friends, supporting loved ones when they need help and listening to people’s anxieties and concerns, when do you think about yourself?
When do you ever say:
“What about me?”
If you are honest, you probably do not ask this question as often as you should.
1. Self-care Tip #1: Change Your Approach
There are limitations to how much you can give and how much you can support other people. You can only do so much. Otherwise, you get tired and ill. You need rest – just like everyone else.
Therefore, make a commitment to treat yourself at least as well as you treat other people from now on. If you give other people space to unwind and relax after a hard day, do the same for yourself. Likewise, if you ask less of those people who matter in your life when they are unwell or stressed, do the same for yourself. If you are considerate when you are with others, be considerate when you think about yourself, and your situation.
2. Self-care Tip #2: Value Yourself
You probably think about other people and their needs before you think about your own needs. You may have been doing this for so long that you no longer recognise what you are doing. The time has come to think differently.
Remind yourself often that you are a human being with needs, wants and desires, just like other people. You spend a lot of time thinking about others. Spare some time for yourself as well. Work out what you need, what you would like to do and what you aspire to do in the future.
Respect yourself and your needs and wants. Value yourself. Allow yourself to take care of your own needs as well as helping others. Remind yourself that you are an important person, too. Give yourself permission to have what you want in life as well as helping others to achieve their goals.
3. Self-care Tip #3: Improve Your Life
When you pay more attention to yourself, you will notice a change in how you view the world. You will be happier and the world will seem to be a better place. You will also be less likely to feel resentment towards other people because they appear to have a better life than you do. Things will have changed. You now have a good life, too. You will also find that you are a better company and an easier person to live with simply because you enjoy life more.
By allowing yourself to focus more on what you need and what you want you will find that life will be better for everyone in your circle. You will be helping your friends, your family, your work colleagues and other people with whom you interact regularly to have a better experience when they interact with you. Therefore, give yourself permission to ask the question:
“What about me?”
Then make sure you allow yourself to answer.
Read more: How do we cope with our need to please others?
Monica Varo is an integrative therapist. She helps her clients to become the people they always hoped they could be. Call her on 07772 467444 when you are ready to learn how to think more positively about your life today and in the future or send her a message through this form
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